The Phantom [Menace] of the Opera

BAD BROADWAY

"At last we will reveal our play to the public, at last we will sing our revenge!"

(Inspired by the #badbroadway trend on Twitter)

Mandela Memorial

FAKE SIGNER AT MANDELA'S MEMORIAL REVEALED!

HE CLAIMS TO BE FLUENT IN OVER SIX MILLION FORMS OF COMMUNICATION...

JUST NOT SIGN LANGUAGE.

Siri

Happy New Year

Happy New Year from Jedi Order PR!

Cucumbers

The Rebellion unleashed its latest attack on the Empire this week. No, there were no trench run style assaults on an exhaust port or sabotaging of a reactor core. This attack was far more subtle, and deadly…

In an attempt to introduce a "5 a day" style healthier option to meals in the Death Star Cantina, the Empire has banished Bantha Burgers and Fries to the airlock in favour of salad. Yes, plain old healthy salad with no saturated fat and no added sugar or salt. Or so they thought...

Vegetable Plot: The Stolen Death Star Cantina Menu

Cannon Fodder Imperial Troops have been getting fat on a poor diet of un-healthy food lately, so what better way to improve their diet (before they die in battle at the hands of the Rebellion), than a serving of fresh salad.   

The Rebellion's ever dwindling friends, the Bothan Spies, obtained the secret plans to the Death Star Cantina Menu and the Rebellion's "Operation Waldorf Salad" began to bear fruit (and veg).

A Top Rebel Chef

Obtaining a "particularly virulent" crate of  ecoli infected cucumbers from the Northern Region of Germany, Rebel Chef's began re-creating the Empire Menu (shown above) with salads, baguettes, wraps and a host of delicious dishes.

These would then be packed in Empire crates and shipped to the Death Star. Universal Exports, would act as the shipping agents to transport the deadly food to the Death Star Cantina where other agents on board would take care of the rest.

Cross Section of a deadly cucumber

Soon reports were surfacing of Stormtroopers falling ill to a 'mystery illness'. The Empire attempted to gag the press with a so called "Super Injunction" taken out by "evil legal eagle" @DarkSideLawyer, on @LordPalpatine's request.  

However, this could not contain the leak of information, regarding the outbreak, coming from social media sites like "Forcebook" on board the Death Star. The Rebellion's plan was working, and like the outbreak, word was spreading FAST.

The dramatic image below, was posted on Jedi Order PR's "Forcebook" page. It shows a Legion of mutated "Salad Troopers" in the grip of the zombie like outbreak.  

Star Wars Episode II: Attack of the Cucumbers - "Salad Troopers" in the grip of the cucumber ecoli outbreak

Emperor Palpatine's Spa Day goes horribly wrong

So for now, it seems the 'salad days' of the Empire may be coming to an end and the Rebellion can avoid a costly all out attack on the Death Star. All thanks to the innocuous cucumber, a true "weapon of mass destruction" (or should that be consumption), if there ever was. 

As you can see from this exclusive image, taken on one of our Bothan Spies mobile phone, even the Emperor himself has succumbed to cucumber zombification...Operation Waldorf Salad has been a complete success.

JOPR on Twitter:

"We've replaced all the cucumbers on the Death Star with a fresh batch direct from Germany. Bon Appetite, guys.#jedicare #ecoli *

*This post was inspired by the cucumber tweet by Jedi Order PR

Jedi Movies

Our recent hashtag posting on Twitter, #JediMovies proved to be very popular with the Twitterverse and ran for nearly 3 days! 

It produced a whole variety of Jedi themed movie parodies which were extremely funny and very clever. 

Presented in movie poster form, is one of Jedi Order PR's funniest (and possibly most contentious) suggestions for the #JediMovies meme. 


Derived from the Seth Rogen comedy "Zack and Miri Make A Porno", here's our twisted version!

Now if that doesn't spark the whole Luke & Leia 'tricky' relationship thing with Han, we don't know what will...

Alderaan

 

The day Alderaan decides to review its peaceful "no weapons policy"...

Awful Supergroups

Today on Twitter saw the latest top trend include the hashtag: #awfulsupergroups

Here is Jedi Order PR's post presented in visual form & without comment.

Spot The Difference

Leaking out from an un-named source today, it has emerged that Darth Vader not only had the ear of the Emperor, but it seems he may have had that of the 'King' as well. 

 

Evidence has emerged documenting the moment that the Dark Lord met Elvis Presley, a famed 'Rock & Roll' star from Earth. Despite the fact that Lord Vader is notoriously tone deaf, it's been revealed he was a huge fan of the Earthling King's recordings. 

Over the last few years there had been speculation that Vader had been known to 'download' 'rock & roll' songs to is chest plate iPod and let's face it; when you've heard the Imperial March once, you've heard it a thousand times.

 
 
However we can reveal today that this photograph may have been faked and the whole thing is the product of some sneaky PR. We have obtained other so called 'Meet The King' photographs, and things look very dodgy indeed. Judge for yourself and see if you can spot the real* from the fake**...

*The original photograph is the one taken with the then President Richard 'Tricky Dickie' Nixon. 
**Jar Jar Binks never met the President but was implicated in the Watergate affair & remains a hated figure in America to this day.

Star Wars Hotel California (Hostile Death Star Station)

Jedi Order PR Proudly Presents

"Hotel California (Hostile Death Star Station)"

The song is our very first parody and is inspired by The Eagles classic "Hotel California" but given the Star Wars treatment. It has a completely original comedy lyric and clips from Star Wars Episode IV: A New Hope & Episode V: The Empire Strikes Back, propelling the lyric as a music video. The song was written, and sung by, yours truly!

If you like this then it may interest you to know that another parody is in production. Keep your eyes peeled on Twitter and we'll let you know when its available to view on our You Tube page and here on the blog.

Star Wars Hotel California (Hostile Death Star Station)

On a dark galactic highway, there's no wind in your hair
Warm smell of a Wookiee, rising up through the air
Up ahead in the distance, I saw a shimmering light

My head grew heavy and the Force grew dim
I had to land from the fright
Leia stood in the hatchway;
I heard a warning bell
And I was thinking to myself,
’this aint heaven so I'll see you in hell’
Then she let go of the handle and she showed me the bay
Storm Troopers down the corridor,

I heard their com links say…

Welcome to this hostile Death Star Station
Such a nasty place (such a nasty place)
Such an evil face
Plenty of doom in this hostile battle station
Any time of year (any time of year), you'll find Vader here

His mind is bitterly-twisted, he's got an Emperor he tends
He's got a lot of Bounty Hunter guys, that he calls friends
How they march in the hangars, their destinies set.
The Old Republic they remember, but they choose to forget

So Vader calls up the captain,
’This rebel scum's mine’
He said, ’I will break your spirit here in cell number sixty nine’
And still dead Jedi's are calling from far away
Wake you up in the middle of the fight
Just to hear them say...
 

We'll come to this hostile Death Star Station
And blow this place (and blow this place)
Right back in to space
Blowing stuff up was this hostile Death Star Station
Not a nice surprise (not a nice surprise), when your planet dies...

Luke has got a feeling,
Hoth is full of ice
And Leia said ’we are all just prisoners here, of this plot device’
And in the Wampa's chambers,
They gathered for a feast
Luke jabs it with his laser sword,
And then an arm drops off the beast

Last thing I remember, I was
Running for the door
I had to find the passage back
To the place my ship was before
’Relax,’ said Jedi Knight man,
My works done here, we can leave.
You can take off any time you like,
In the Force you must believe!

Lyrics by Jedi Order PR. Performed by The PR Director

Video edited byJedi Order PR & Plot 88 Productions

Based on Hotel California by The Eagles

The Man With The Midas Touch: John Barry 1933-2011

The output of this blog is usually comedic in nature but today we're taking a sombre tone in order to mark the passing of a true movie legend, and one of our music heroes. 

As a fan of cinema and film music it's only fitting we pay tribute to someone whose contribution to movies influenced and shaped the way in which movies are enjoyed to this day.

Fellow John Barry fan, movie buff and James Bond expert, Twitter's @DogHollywood contacted us to see if we would publish a tribute to John Barry, the movie genius who died today aged 77. Being fans of Star Wars, James Bond & movies in general, we of course, dutifully obliged...



DogHollywood writes: There are moments in your life that can contribute to who you are or who you may become. I can recall two of these moments because of the profound nature of the experience I had when I encountered each of them. One was during a James Bond film; the other was Star Wars. Both of these moments involved two greats of movie legend: John Barry & John Williams.

 

In August 1973 I went to see Roger Moore play James Bond in "Live & Let Die". I was nearly 8 years old and this was my first ever trip to a cinema to see a movie. I did not know at the time, but it was a double feature that day, and the movie that came on before the one I wanted to see, was "Goldfinger". 

The effect was nothing short of astonishing; a small dot appeared on screen followed by a man walking who shoots a gun to camera. It carried with it an iconic arrangement that would stay with me forever: John Barry's James Bond Theme Opening Gunbarrel. The rest is movie legend which kick started a love of James Bond, Bond music, motion pictures and film scores in general.

John Barry was the man behind that moment, from then on my life would never be the same again. Long after I was enthralled by Sean Connery (& subsequently Roger Moore) as Bond, John Barry's iconic music stayed with me. In later years, John Williams score would have the same effect when a 12 year old me saw a little film called "Star Wars".

The movies aside, one of the fundamental elements of any film is its music. John Barry understood this and could look at a film and instantly know what music would capture the mood on screen. The music involves you in the story, can make the hairs onthe back of your neck stand up, or even move you to tears. 

John Barry's contribution to movie music is an awesome body of work that included 12 James Bond films, The Ipcress File, Midnight Cowboy, Born Free, The Persuaders TV Theme, The Lion In Winter, King Kong, Chaplin, Out of Africa & Dances with Wolves to name but a few of nearly 100 films. (Not to mention George Lucas' turkey (pun intended) 'Howard The Duck').

Try thinking of all the major Hollywood blockbusters and chances are its been scored by John Barry or John Williams! Music is the movies as much as the star, or the merchandising.

Hum the opening bars of the James Bond Theme or The Imperial March & everybody knows instantly what it is and where it's from. How many things have that resonance and power, how many people truly achieve such genius.

I will miss John Barry, however he will live on in my iPod whenever one of his melodies comes on, or on a rainy bank holiday when James Bond is saving the world and getting the girl.

Thank you for the music, the memories and for bringing something in to my life that I will never ever tire of listening to: The Music of John Barry.

Dog Hollywood*, January 2010.

*Dog Hollywood is a movie/music/pop culture fan and expert in everything James Bond. You can follow him on Twitter @DogHollywood. 

Star Wars Candy Hearts

Star Wars Candy Hearts Inspired by a Twitter Meme Created by @WampaPR

"Bury your feelings...or they could be made to serve the Emperor"

Ben 'Obi-Wan' Kenobi

A Campaign Message From Master Yoda

"So, began the Shorty Awards have...

I sense much fear in you. but afraid to vote for Jedi Order PR, you must not be. 

A vote flows from the Force, and a powerful vote it will be, for the Force is our ally. It surrounds us, penetrates us and binds the Shorty Awards together. 

When voted for Jedi Order PR have you, the last of your voting will this be. Then, only then, will the Force be with you.

Click the image below and for JEDI ORDER PR, in #STARWARS, you must VOTE..."

Master Yoda

The 3rd Annual Shorty Awards

If you want to save the galaxy from the evil Empire then do the decent and vote for us by clicking the image below:

The Shorty Awards honor the best people and organizations on Twitter and social media. Nominations may be made through Twitter and the Shorty Awards website.

The community is invited to nominate Twitter users for excellence over the past year. Each award recognizes each content creator's entire body of work, not just an individual tweet. Nominations are made by sending a tweet, whether it's through this site or on Twitter.

Vote for Jedi Order PR in the '#Star Wars' Category today!

 

A New Year, A New Hope

It's been an incredible year for Jedi Order PR, we've gone from "Zero to Hero" since we opened our PR office and unleashed it on the galaxy, way back in July 2010.

We would just like to take this opportunity to thank you for your support and wish you all a Happy & Prosperous New Year - The Force will be with you, Always!  

Make it your New Year's Resolution to join us in 2011, where the struggle to free the galaxy from the clutches of the evil Empire, will continue...

Jedi Order PR

"What Is Thy Bidding, My Master?"

Darth Vader's outfit being auctioned off*

When it comes to budget cuts it seems not even the fearsome Darth Vader is spared. A cash strapped Empire is making drastic budget cuts in its spending, possibly to fund their ongoing galactic war or maybe to build the Death Star 3 (after the Rebel Alliance blew up the last two).

So it would seem that Lord Vader is being 'forced' to sell off one of his iconic outfits in order to raise some much needed cash. 

The suit in question is the one Vader wore when confronting Luke in the infamous 'I am your father' encounter on Cloud City. Some critics however, have suggested that, in a move not untypical of the Dark Lord, the costume may be a 'prop replica'.

Lately, Darth Vader has come under increasing pressure from Emperor Palpatine in order to reign in the spending on arms, ammunition and the spiralling costs of failing to destroy Luke Skywalker or crush the Rebellion. This cost is rumoured to run in to the trillions of Galactic Credits.

Darth Vader seeks a Galactic Bail out

The auction of the costume, due to take place on the Death Star, is expected to attract Darth Vader memorabilia collectors, bounty hunters and even a few 'Rebel Scum'. All eyeing up a potential investment and a rare piece of Imperial Memorabilia. 

The Empire is currently seeking a bail out from the IMF (Intergalactic Monetry Fund), since it was revealed it had not paid back the original loans to the Geonosians, for the construction of Death Stars 1 & 2. Adding to this are the heavy loses the Empire has suffered on Hoth and Endor, not to mention all the compensation claims and lawsuits it has to pay as a result of its bungled operations throughout the galaxy. 

No doubt Lord Vader will be finding his 'lack of cash' disturbing and will be hoping his outfit fetches the valuation price of a quarter of a million credits.

Hold up, isn't that Lord Vader?

If it fails to make a garrison of cash for Vader; he may find he will have to part with his treasured stash of vintage Jedi action figures, all mint condition and still in their original blister packs, of course. Or even, heaven forbid, his treasured Slave Leia Outfit, a gift from the late Jabba the Hutt.

 

Maybe Vader's sad devotion to the ancient Sith religion may help conjure up some much needed cash. If not he can always return to robbing banks as our exclusive picture reveals. Looks like he's sold his Lightsaber off as well...

Instead of saying "What is thy bidding, my Master..?" to the Emperor, maybe  he should be asking: "What are YOU bidding, my Master?"

*The original Darth Vader costume is to be auctioned off at Sotheby's on Thursday 25th November 2010 and is expected to fetch around £250,000.

Rebellion PR: "The Return of the Rebel"

Today saw the return of Rebellion PR after a two week absence after the original account went offline and was frozen in carbonite.

This is not the first time this has happened. Rebel Alliance PR went the same way some weeks after a successful launch on Twitter back in August 2010. Swiftly returning with renewed vigour; Rebellion PR soon had over 2800 followers before its sudden disappearance in early November.

A source close to Rebellion PR said: "The Rebels were having a tough time, a 'crisis of faith' if you will." So what happened and why the sudden dramatic return? 

It seems this so called 'crisis of faith' comes down to a number of factors: Twitter trolls, Tweeters block and follower backlash to 'contoversial & often edgy' material, have all been cited as reasons to why Rebellion PR shut down quicker than C-3PO on a bad day. The truth is harder to come by however.

A Bothan spy told us: "Rebellion PR had enormous success with their brand of  'random' tweets, but behind the success, the Rebels were becoming increasingly bored and frustrated with the twitter experience". 

After they had disappeared, a meme called #RememberRebellionPR was started by us here at Jedi Order PR, to keep the spirit of the Rebels alive on Twitter. It seems this meme was a success because lurking in the shadows, secretly evaluating the comments, was the Rebellion's Head of PR - quietly plotting a dramatic return when the time was right*.

Like most clever PR, this whole episode could be construed as merely a sly publicity stunt. We believe, like Star Wars itself, it's a story that's ultimately about redemption. The Rebels live to self destruct, only to emerge some time later, but more powerful than you could possibly imagine...

*Rebellion PR is back on Twitter as @Rebellion_PR and this time they're back for good...well, for now.

Meet The Skywalkers

"Happy Halloween!"

"I'm not using a pumpkin for my Jack O'Lantern tonight. I'm using Jango Fett's helmet. Looks awesome with a candle in it." Jedi Order PR

Spacebook

The circle is complete!
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