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Sunday 23 January 2011

The Empire's Secret Base On Earth: Revealed

There's has always been a deep suspicion within the Jedi ranks that the Empire had a garrison stationed on the distant Terran planet called Earth. We can exclusively reveal that this myth; is indeed fact.

Bothan Spies go un-noticed while undercover

Bothan spies, on a secret reconnaisance mission on Earth, recently uncovered evidence that the Empire has established a garrison in a place known as the 'Northern Territory' in Australia. 

This 'Tatooine' like location is the perfect place for the Empire to place an outpost in its attempt to enslave the Earth. It is remote, rugged and perfectly suited to Sand Troopers and their Dewbacks.

Our exclusive images, secretly captured by the Bothan spies do seem to substansiate this claim.  


Sand Troopers posing as 'Tourists' secretly photographed by Bothan Spies
  
Suspicion's that the Empire had a base of operations originally centred on the Australian city of Sydney. However, recent intelligence suggests that this is merely the location of an office claiming to be a 'radical PR firm' with links to the Empire.

As the Bothan's began to delve deeper in to this shocking story, the more evidence they uncovered. 

Using a primitive Earthican technology known only as 'Google', the Bothans were able to identify the location of the Empire outpost. It's revealed here for the very first time.  


Many Bothan's died to bring us this information.
This information, however, has come to us at a very heavy price. Despite their uncanny ability to 'seemlessly' blend in to any environment and going un-noticed, many Bothan spies have mysteriously disappeared. 

Speculation is rife that they have been captured or killed. Some say they may have become so ingrained in the culture they may have become 'naturalised' and are passing themselves off as 'surfer dudes'.

Either way, the Bothan's managed to find the one piece of hard evidence that the Empire does have a garrison in the Northern Territories. This so called 'Jedi Holy Grail' of evidence is hard to deny.

Tourism NT's Official logo and it's uncanny resemblance to the Death Star


It seems that the willing partners of this Imperial base have incorporated an iconic Empire image into their PR material. The image seen right is the official logo of 'Northern Territory Australia: Tourism NT'. Look closely at that so called 'setting sun'. Look familiar?

We are convinced beyond doubt, that the Empire has formed an alliance of evil, and a sinister plot to take over the Earth is already underway.


3 comments:

  1. Hilarious! The Northen Territories have some explaining to do!!

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  2. I saw this logo appear on an advert on TV for the Northern Territories. It's for real! I just thought - hey it's the Death Star!

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  3. Good grief, I'm still laughing!!! 'Tis a cunning plan - the Empire have even used the Aboriginal Australians' "sacred ground" belief system to their advantage. There's now a sign at the bottom of the Ayers rock climb requesting that people show respect by not walking on it. Want proof?
    http://www.outback-australia-travel-secrets.com/climbing-ayers-rock-uluru.html
    Makes it easier for troops to come and go unnoticed, hey?

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